At 11:15pm on Monday night July 7th Noah and I went to the hospital. Isaac stayed with Marmee and Gran Gran. The waiting room was pretty much full when we got there. There were a couple of families and a couple of waiting pregnant women. We signed in and found a seat and waited. We waited for a long time but we were in no hurry since we were there to be induced. I felt bad that I was depriving Noah of sleep because he was supposed to be able to sleep once we got in the labor and delivery room. Noah read in his summer reading book for school and I think I even fell asleep at one point.
At 1:30am we were called back to an open labor and delivery room. The nurse apologized for our wait but we were fine. Once we got in the room I got prepped for the bed and they put on the three belly bands and monitors; one for Baby A, one for Baby B, and one for contractions. She had a really hard time finding the babies. Both babies were wide awake and were moving around like crazy. They kept jumping off the monitors. Another nurse went ahead and put an IV in my hand but didn't connect it to anything because we were waiting until the morning. By the time we had filled out our paper work, gotten the babies on the monitor, and were ready it was after 3:00am. Noah really wasn't getting any sleep. I turned on the television and tried to sleep as well but it was too hard. The bands itched like crazy, I felt like I was on fire. Also because Baby A was so low and Baby B was in the crook of my leg, in order to keep the monitors on the babies I had to be lying on my back when all I wanted to do was sit up. Every time the nurse left, I would carefully try to position myself into a comfortable position but eventually she would have to come back and try to find the babies and move me back to a very uncomfortable position.
It was a pretty unpleasant night, but fortunately it was only about two hours long. At 5:00am she hooked me up to the pitocin. She said she would put it at its lowest setting and very very slowly bump it up every half hour or hour. She did a cervical check before she started the pitocin and low and behold I was 3.5 centimeters dilated. I had still been closed at my appointment earlier in the day on Monday. So that was very encouraging. The doctor had told us that the hardest part of the labor would be getting it started and me dilated enough to break my water. Once my water had been broken it would be faster and smoother.
I asked her about an epidural and she said that most people didn't get the epidural when the pitocin first started. I really wanted the epidural, I had read that those pregnant with twins should always have it because the risk of c-section is so great that you need to have had it on the chance you will wind up with a c-section. Also, I was already in a lot of pain.
My belly had been stretched so thin. The lower part of my belly was supporting such weight it was always bumpy and sore. My skin was so very very itchy. The babies were putting so much pressure on my cervix it was almost unbearable.
Once the pitocin started, my contractions started too. Noah and I could see them rise and fall on the monitor and I could feel them. For the first time, I put some of those breathing excersises to use to help with the pain. I knew that this nurse would be leaving soon for shift change, so I decided that once the new nurse got there, I would ask for the epidural.
7am was the shift change and we got two new nurses who were in charge. One nurse spent a lot of time with me and the other nurse tried to get the machine ready for the twins that wouldhelp them breathe should they need it. I wasn't fully aware of what was going on over there but she was having a lot of trouble with the machine. She called in at least three different people to help her and they even rolled one out and athe new one in to see if that would work but they really couldn't get it to work because they could get one bag to fill with air at a time but now two bags. She told me we probably wouldn't need this anyway.
They kept increasing my pitocin level and I asked for the epidural. They called for the anetheseologist but he was somewhere else with a c-section patient.
The on-call doctor came by and asked if our doctor was delivering us and we told him that our doctor was.
When the anetheseologist arrived finally I was very ready but very scared. Epidurals are very scary. I sat up and leaned forward. One of the nurses was really helpful and help my shoulders and kept me calm. THe anetheseologist wasn't a very good people person. Once he had put in the needle he started saying 'o crap' over and over again. I wished he would have just kept that in his head, he made me so nervous. He told me to say something if I got a bad taste in my mouth and my mouth did feel a bit numb so I told him that and he said he thought so. The needle had gone in a blood vessel so he had to pull everything out and do it all over again in a new place. The new place worked and the epidural was in. It doesn't hurt very badly but it is a very very weird sensation. I was so glad the second one tookd and he administored the medicine.
After the epidural took hold, I felt the weight of the world drop off of me. For months I had felt so bad and so stretched. My skin was constantly itching, there was constant pressure on my left hip and my cervix. I had been having contractions on and off. There was no position that could make me comfortable. I could barely change positions at all. Any sudden movement would result in a pull and pain. But once the epidural took place, I felt free. I didn't feel the pressure or the itching or the contractions. I could lie in any position. For the past nine months, I had struggled to fall asleep, stay asleep, or be asleep and at all, and now I felt so relaxed, I could barely stay awake even as I labored.
I drifted in and our of consciousness as the nurses came back and forth to our room to monitor the contractions and babies' heart rates. Noah was amused at how high and delirious I was. It was the most relaxed I had felt and would feel for a long time. It was a short reprieve for the life of pregnancy to the life of newborn parenthood.
The doctor arrived at around 9:00 to break my water. He checked me and I was about seven centimeters dilated. We were making good and fast progress. He said he would be back soon.
I continued to drift in and out of consciousness and around 10:30 or so, we were ready. The room was really abuzz as we got ready. At one point there were five nurses, two for me and three for the babies, and two doctors, my doctor and the on-call doctor. The nurses had two stations set up for the babies and were preparing for them. My nurses were on either side of me. The doctor had his trey set up with all sorts of equipment and they laid down all sorts of sheets and pads and scrubs.
It was time to push. Pushing Baby A, Carleton out was not too difficult. He arrived at 11:05am, even faster than Isaac had. I pushed for probably five or six contractions, with three or four pushes on each contraction. The nurses were great, they would count to ten as I pushed and then tell me to take a deep breath and do it again. We did really well with Carleton. He didn't come out screaming as Isaac had, but he fussed and gurgled and they whisked him away to the warming/bathing/apgar station. Noah got to cut the cord as they placed him on my chest right before they took him away. Noah followed him over to the station and the nurses told Noah to get out his camera. Noah took pictures and looked after Carleton as we prepared to push again.
Baby B was higher up so we had a lot more pushing to do. The doctor broke my water again and it GUSHED. I had never noticed my water breaking before, but this was something truly dramatic. I couldn't believe how much water there was.
Since everything was going well, the on- call doctor ended up leaving. Carleton was cleaned up and put in a blanket and hat and Noah was able to hold him and walk around the room as we pushed with Baby B, Corder. I had to push for about forty minutes to get Corder out. He was so high up, I couldn't feel the pressure of him to help guide my pushing. It was much harder to push with Corder. They kept telling me to push harder but since I couldn't feel much of anything, it was difficult. We pushed for many more contractions than we had for Carleton. As he got down lower, I could start feeling the pressure, and pushing became easier. I must have been tired even with the epidural because as I was supposed to push four times on each contraction, I could feel myself getting weaker each time. I only had power for the first two pushes and the last two would be really weak. The doctor said his heart rate was dipping just a bit during the contractions and he decided to help pull him out with the vacuum. A few more pushes later, I could feel the extreme pressure of him being right there. Next contraction, he was out. Like Carleton, he fussed but didn't scream. They put him on my chest, Noah cut the cord, and he was whisked away to baby warming.
The doctor then finished the delivery and gave me my stitches and left.
Mom and Isaac were the first ones into the delivery room. Mom stayed behind the curtain because she had been running a fever. Isaac came in and saw Noah hold Carleton. Noah showed him Carleton, and his first question was 'Where's Corder?' They showed him Corder ont he warming station. Isaac came over and saw me. He seemed to completley understand that we were in the hospital to meet Carleton and Corder just as we had told him and read to him.
Mom left and Mrs. McQueen and Dad came in. Isaac was still with us. Mrs. McQueen got to hold babies. Isaac started feeling more comfortable with the situation and started becoming more animated. Dad took Isaac back out to the waiting room and Patti came in. Mrs. McQueen and Patti took lots of pictures of the babies and us. Then they left.
The nurses were able to get me into the wheel chair and handed me both babies. We had stayed in the recovery room much longer than we had with Isaac. They had been bathed in the recover room and we waited to make sure they could keep their temperature up.
Noah carried our things, and I carried the babies as we were wheeled up to our room.
Showing posts with label Pregnancy Thoughts. Show all posts
Showing posts with label Pregnancy Thoughts. Show all posts
Sunday, July 13, 2014
Thursday, July 10, 2014
July Update No. 2
On Thursday July 3rd, we went back to Labor and Delivery for our second Non-Stress Test of the week. The same nurse as Monday gave us the test. Once again both babies passed the test with very good results. She told us our next instructions were just to keep our appointment with our doctor on Monday and to make sure I could count at least four kicks from each baby every hour.
Ugh. I know this is horrible, but I can't tell who is moving. It's been so frustrating. When I was pregnant with Isaac, if I felt movement, I felt so relieved because I knew he was fine, but this time....I just don't have the same level of comfort.
Well, Isaac spent the night with Marmee and Grandma on Friday night and at 5:00 on Saturday morning July 5th, I woke up in a great deal of pain. I was having contractions and felt a lot of pressure. Noah and I decided to head up to the hospital. He even brought the hospital bag inside the hospital for the first time. We went up with some confidence that we would be having babies.
The nurse told us that our doctor was the doctor on call which sounded like we had stumbled into a perfect situation. She even put us in a labor and delivery room instead of a triage room. We got hooked up and they started monitoring heart beats and contractions.
We stayed for about two hours. I had consistent contractions for the two hours but they were not in a regularly occurring pattern, nor were they strong enough to change our dilation state. Also, our doctor was not the doctor on call after all. We were sent home.
The nurse said, if she had been the doctor she might not have sent us home but to come back anytime this weekend if we felt any change; if the contractions got stronger or closer together or if I didn't feel at least four movements each hour.
Counting movements has now consumed me.
On Monday July 2nd we went to our doctor's appointment. Both babies looked good on the ultrasound. Both were head down and had good heart rates. We met with the doctor who said everything looked good and asked if we would rather show up at the hospital at 11:30 that night or get up and be there at 5:00am the next morning. We chose to go at 11:30 so the babies could be monitored and I didn't have to toss and turn and not sleep all night worrying about them.
Ugh. I know this is horrible, but I can't tell who is moving. It's been so frustrating. When I was pregnant with Isaac, if I felt movement, I felt so relieved because I knew he was fine, but this time....I just don't have the same level of comfort.
Well, Isaac spent the night with Marmee and Grandma on Friday night and at 5:00 on Saturday morning July 5th, I woke up in a great deal of pain. I was having contractions and felt a lot of pressure. Noah and I decided to head up to the hospital. He even brought the hospital bag inside the hospital for the first time. We went up with some confidence that we would be having babies.
The nurse told us that our doctor was the doctor on call which sounded like we had stumbled into a perfect situation. She even put us in a labor and delivery room instead of a triage room. We got hooked up and they started monitoring heart beats and contractions.
We stayed for about two hours. I had consistent contractions for the two hours but they were not in a regularly occurring pattern, nor were they strong enough to change our dilation state. Also, our doctor was not the doctor on call after all. We were sent home.
The nurse said, if she had been the doctor she might not have sent us home but to come back anytime this weekend if we felt any change; if the contractions got stronger or closer together or if I didn't feel at least four movements each hour.
Counting movements has now consumed me.
On Monday July 2nd we went to our doctor's appointment. Both babies looked good on the ultrasound. Both were head down and had good heart rates. We met with the doctor who said everything looked good and asked if we would rather show up at the hospital at 11:30 that night or get up and be there at 5:00am the next morning. We chose to go at 11:30 so the babies could be monitored and I didn't have to toss and turn and not sleep all night worrying about them.
Tuesday, July 1, 2014
July Update No. 1
Well, we made it to the month of our due date.
On July 1st we went to our doctor's appointment at 38w1d. Babies' had good heart rates and Baby B shifted again and both are vertex again!!!!! So, I was ready to induce and get them OUT! My blood pressure was up a bit for me 132/72 but everything looked good. I thought we would definitely get the babies out today or by Thursday.
The doctor did an examination and my cervix was still pretty much closed. :( He was pretty amazed we had not gone into labor yet. I asked him about inducing. Not gonna happen. He told me that doctor's do not induce twins. He said the medicines used for inducing are too hard on the uterus and a uterus carrying twins has worked too hard to handle them.
Okay, so that's definitely not what we were told last week.
Basically, I'm pretty sure he and all the other doctors don't want to touch us with a ten foot pole. They'll monitor us and make sure we're healthy, but they're not getting these babies out. Too risky for them. He said he would talk to our doctor's nurse and see if any plans were left for us. He acknowledged that things would get kind of crazy with the holiday weekend coming up but said someone would be on-call if we went into labor naturally.
He scheduled another Non-Stress Test for Thursday. I would imagine if we fail this test, an on-call doctor would perform an emergency c-section. We also set up an appointment on Monday with our normal doctor at 39 weeks.
Our own doctor's nurse called later to ask how we felt about an induction next week. I said we were all for it! She said she would see if she could get in contact with the doctor to try and get something scheduled before the end of this week because she would be on vacation next week..........
So we're in wait mode. Monitor the babies' movement. Non Stress Test on Thursday to make sure everyone is still thriving. Who knows, I could see me getting nervous over the weekend, maybe we'll make an emergency run to Labor and Delivery on Saturday.... just make sure everyone is healthy.
If we don't go into labor naturally, we're headed to 39 weeks. Most doctor's believe that the safest window to have twins is 38-39 weeks so we're pushing that envelope, which is the reason for the extra non-stress tests.
We will be praying for healthy thriving babies for one more week.
On July 1st we went to our doctor's appointment at 38w1d. Babies' had good heart rates and Baby B shifted again and both are vertex again!!!!! So, I was ready to induce and get them OUT! My blood pressure was up a bit for me 132/72 but everything looked good. I thought we would definitely get the babies out today or by Thursday.
The doctor did an examination and my cervix was still pretty much closed. :( He was pretty amazed we had not gone into labor yet. I asked him about inducing. Not gonna happen. He told me that doctor's do not induce twins. He said the medicines used for inducing are too hard on the uterus and a uterus carrying twins has worked too hard to handle them.
Okay, so that's definitely not what we were told last week.
Basically, I'm pretty sure he and all the other doctors don't want to touch us with a ten foot pole. They'll monitor us and make sure we're healthy, but they're not getting these babies out. Too risky for them. He said he would talk to our doctor's nurse and see if any plans were left for us. He acknowledged that things would get kind of crazy with the holiday weekend coming up but said someone would be on-call if we went into labor naturally.
He scheduled another Non-Stress Test for Thursday. I would imagine if we fail this test, an on-call doctor would perform an emergency c-section. We also set up an appointment on Monday with our normal doctor at 39 weeks.
Our own doctor's nurse called later to ask how we felt about an induction next week. I said we were all for it! She said she would see if she could get in contact with the doctor to try and get something scheduled before the end of this week because she would be on vacation next week..........
So we're in wait mode. Monitor the babies' movement. Non Stress Test on Thursday to make sure everyone is still thriving. Who knows, I could see me getting nervous over the weekend, maybe we'll make an emergency run to Labor and Delivery on Saturday.... just make sure everyone is healthy.
If we don't go into labor naturally, we're headed to 39 weeks. Most doctor's believe that the safest window to have twins is 38-39 weeks so we're pushing that envelope, which is the reason for the extra non-stress tests.
We will be praying for healthy thriving babies for one more week.
Monday, June 30, 2014
June Update No. 5
Well we're still in a pretty unknown place right now. After deciding not to induce last week at 37 weeks and our doctor being out of town this week, we're all basically little nomads begging for appointments. You can read about last week's (mis)adventures here June Update No. 4
At 1am on Saturday morning June 27th, Noah and I went to Labor and Delivery to get checked out and make sure I wasn't leaking any amniotic fluid. Because Baby B had moved positions, my stomach has a very different feel to it and we got checked out. Babies' heart rates looked great, cervix was still closed, and no amniotic fluid. The nurse was very nice. I just might be freaking out and over analyzing everything.
Our appointment for this Monday had been changed from a normal doctor's appointment to a Non Stress Test at Labor and Delivery. So on June 30th at 38 weeks, we went to the hospital for a 10:00 non stress test. The test took about 30 minutes. They monitored my contractions and the babies' heart rates. I had about three contractions in the 30 minutes, one big one and two little ones, and the babies' heart rates looked great so the nurse sent us home and told us to keep our prenatal appointment. Of course we didn't have a prenatal appointment because today was scheduled to be our prenatal appointment but it was changed after we left the office to this test. So......... once again I had to call the office and say 'hey I do not have an appointment, and I need to be seen'
Since my doctor was out of town, the receptionist asked if we had any preferences, so I said we have seen this certain doctor twice now, so let's just stay with him. We have an appointment tomorrow at 10:30am.
So.....I don't know what our plan is, with our doctor being gone and the holiday weekend coming up, we're going to need to get something planned out. We'll talk to the doctor tomorrow. Maybe he will want to schedule something this week or we might be waiting until Monday July 7th. We'll see what we can get him to set up for us.
I am very, very, very, very ready for this all to be over. I know part of this mess is my fault because I chose not to induce at 37 weeks with my doctor. Now Baby B has flipped and is breach which complicates things, our doctor is out of town which complicates things, and the holiday weekend is here which complicates things but ultimately, I am glad we made it to 38 weeks. That had been my goal from the beginning and I made this choice solely for their benefit, to give them time to grow and develop as best they can. It has made life harder for me, but it's just one more week, I can make it.
Please just pray for the safety of the babies. I need to be able to count 4 movements every hour, of course it scares me a bit because I don't know for every movement who is moving. There are some movements where I am pretty sure that is Baby B and some movements where I am pretty sure that is Baby A but then there are others where I have no idea. Though I am happy to wait one more week, I just need to be very cautious that the babies are healthy and thriving.
My biggest concerns right now are our possible (probable?) c-section and making sure the babies' are thriving in the womb.
At 1am on Saturday morning June 27th, Noah and I went to Labor and Delivery to get checked out and make sure I wasn't leaking any amniotic fluid. Because Baby B had moved positions, my stomach has a very different feel to it and we got checked out. Babies' heart rates looked great, cervix was still closed, and no amniotic fluid. The nurse was very nice. I just might be freaking out and over analyzing everything.
Our appointment for this Monday had been changed from a normal doctor's appointment to a Non Stress Test at Labor and Delivery. So on June 30th at 38 weeks, we went to the hospital for a 10:00 non stress test. The test took about 30 minutes. They monitored my contractions and the babies' heart rates. I had about three contractions in the 30 minutes, one big one and two little ones, and the babies' heart rates looked great so the nurse sent us home and told us to keep our prenatal appointment. Of course we didn't have a prenatal appointment because today was scheduled to be our prenatal appointment but it was changed after we left the office to this test. So......... once again I had to call the office and say 'hey I do not have an appointment, and I need to be seen'
Since my doctor was out of town, the receptionist asked if we had any preferences, so I said we have seen this certain doctor twice now, so let's just stay with him. We have an appointment tomorrow at 10:30am.
So.....I don't know what our plan is, with our doctor being gone and the holiday weekend coming up, we're going to need to get something planned out. We'll talk to the doctor tomorrow. Maybe he will want to schedule something this week or we might be waiting until Monday July 7th. We'll see what we can get him to set up for us.
I am very, very, very, very ready for this all to be over. I know part of this mess is my fault because I chose not to induce at 37 weeks with my doctor. Now Baby B has flipped and is breach which complicates things, our doctor is out of town which complicates things, and the holiday weekend is here which complicates things but ultimately, I am glad we made it to 38 weeks. That had been my goal from the beginning and I made this choice solely for their benefit, to give them time to grow and develop as best they can. It has made life harder for me, but it's just one more week, I can make it.
Please just pray for the safety of the babies. I need to be able to count 4 movements every hour, of course it scares me a bit because I don't know for every movement who is moving. There are some movements where I am pretty sure that is Baby B and some movements where I am pretty sure that is Baby A but then there are others where I have no idea. Though I am happy to wait one more week, I just need to be very cautious that the babies are healthy and thriving.
My biggest concerns right now are our possible (probable?) c-section and making sure the babies' are thriving in the womb.
Friday, June 27, 2014
June Update No. 4
On June 24th we had another doctor's appointment at 37 weeks 1 day. The ultrasound looked really good. The babies were moving, they had heart rates of 137 and 139, and their fluid amount was just perfect. Baby A was crunched in a little ball very low down and Baby B was on top of him. My blood pressure was good as well but my cervix was still closed.
We had a conversation with the doctor about delivery dates. Before this appointment I had been thinking that 38 weeks was the magic number and we would be induced then if we had not delivered before then. In my mind, I've had the date of June 30th. The doctor told us at this appointment that if we wanted, we could go ahead and induce this week at 37 weeks, or induce next week at 38 weeks, but he would be out of town part of the week and didn't know off hand was his schedule was. We also could wait until 39 weeks when he would be back in town, but he didn't think we would make it that far. Every day we're pregnant, the statistical chance of going into labor rises. That was quite a decision to make in the office. He said we could think on it and call back later that day.
When trying to make an appointment for next week, we asked if we could schedule an inducement with our doctor for next week at 38 weeks pregnant. The receptionist said that our doctor had no office hours the next week at all. So we left to go think some more.
We talked things over with family and decided, well, maybe inducing this Thursday at 37 weeks 3 days would be our best option because he would be able to deliver the babies. I called the doctor's office at 12:00, I waited on the line for over 20 minutes and no one answered the phone, I wasn't even redirected to the emergency line. at 12:30 I called again and no one answered. I called again at 12:45 and then again at 1:00. At 1:00 someone answered and said that my doctor and his nurses had left for the day and someone would call me back the next day. We were worried about getting everything scheduled so Noah called back and asked if someone could call us back today.
The nurse called me back and said that they couldn't schedule anything until tomorrow but it shouldn't be a problem. Then later on, the nurse called back and said she had spoken with the doctor and he wanted me to go in at 10:00pm Wednesday night to get started with the induction for Thursday morning.
All that night we continued to mull things over. We had thought this weekend would work really well with all our family's schedules, but things sort of fell apart and weren't as neat and tidy as we originally had thought. That wasn't a problem but it took the wind out of the 'oh this is the perfect situation'.
I also began to worry. 37 weeks. Are their lungs fully developed at 37 weeks? Will they end up going to the NICU at 37 weeks? Am I giving them their best chance at 37 weeks? Even though I am told every visit, how amazing it is to make it to 37 weeks and I am so grateful to have made it this far, am I looking a gift horse in the mouth to proceed with an elective procedure this soon? How would it be if a baby ended up in the NICU because of a decision I made for him? Isn't my sole job to give these babies everything I've got considering how healthy I am right now?
Of course on the flip side, going too long is also potentially dangerous. Is their chance of stillbirth rising now that we're so far along? Will the placenta dissentegrate? Will they get enough oxygen? Will they suffer from intra-uterine growth restriction?
I asked on my mother of multiples mommy board and read some more on the internet. I just feel like with twins there is this teeny tiny window of 'what is best.' Okay, I can make it to that window and I can easily induce in that window but the problem is, I also feel like that window is a moving target. Some places I read that that window is between 37w0d-38w0d, or is that perfect window 37.5w-38.5w, or is that window 380d-390d?????!!!
At 8:30am on Wednesday morning, I called the doctor's office and told the receptionist I wanted to cancel my induction. The nurse called me back and told me that was fine and to let them know if I changed my mind. I just felt that maybe 37 weeks was too soon. Some babies, especially white boys, end up going to the NICU at 37 weeks because of lung development and/or ability to eat. We gave Isaac until 40w4d and he was so perfect and so healthy. Don't Carleton and Corder deserve that as well?
I feel like the biggest decision I've ever made, where two lives are completely in my hands is right before me. I didn't even know this was a decision I needed to make until two days ago. Am I risking their lives by not inducing this week? If I try to induce next week without my doctor, will the new doctor pressure me into a c-section? Will the new doctor know my case history or know what is best for us? Will there be anyone looking out for us? If I somehow am able to make it to 39 weeks to be induced with my doctor, is that going too long and risking complications for the babies?
As of right now, at 6:45am on Thursday morning, I have nothing scheduled. I do not have an appointment for next week. I do not have an induction scheduled, I do not have a doctor's appointment scheduled. I feel like I could just fall away and no one would notice. I get it. I'm the adult, I'm the mother, it's up to me to make appointments and follow through with them. Hey, that's what I've been doing this whole pregnancy and with Isaac's pregnancy. But, then there's that insecurity I wrestle with. I certainly don't want to be a bother to them. So far, I've seen them on Tuesday, called them twice on Tuesday, and then called them on Wednesday to cancel the induction. Am I pestering them, am I being too needy, am I demanding too much? I know that I am not the most important patient and they are all really busy, but I also feel that I am at a weird and crucial place. I am 37w3d pregnant with twins. That's a scary place to be. I'm back to the same situation I was in while waiting for my glucose test. I knew they were taking way too long, I knew I needed to get that blood test, I knew I had gotten there in plenty of time, and I knew I had been forgotten but I sat quietly and waited because I didn't want to imply to them that they had made a mistake. And 45 minutes later, when I finally said something, they admitted their mistake and said I should have spoken up sooner.
I hate these situations. I don't want to be a bother to anyone. I don't want to demand things of people. But at the same time, I've got two lives who are 100% dependent on me. I can't fall back into the shadow because I feel safe there.
At 8:30am this morning, on Thursday. I am going to call the doctor's office back and ask for an appointment. I'll tell them I think I might be going into labor (hey I had contractions last night). They keep telling me to come on in, if I suspect something. Maybe I'll get a chance at another conversation. Maybe I can get some answers. I'm kind of freaking out. I feel very disconnected and alone right now and maybe my feelings are completely unjustified and I've just made mountains out of mole hills, which I am prone to do.
I called the doctor's office and the receptionist seemed quizzical as to why I wanted to set up an appointment. I told her I was feeling shaky and uneasy. She seemed reluctant to set up an appointment for me but she said a nurse would call me back.
After 11:00 a nurse called me back and said my doctor was unavailable but I could have an appointment with the on-call doctor at 1:00.
I came at 1:00 and met with the nurse. She asked me what was wrong and I told her I was feeling shaky. She asked when my next appointment was and I told her I didn't have one set up. She called my doctor's nurse who told her I was told to have come in that morning. I told her I was not told that at all. Yes, I had an induction set up and yes I cancelled it, but they had not scheduled me another appointment.
We had an ultrasound, the technician didn't say a word to us. I heard the heart beats but I don't know what they were. She spent more time than usual looking at the babies, I could tell something was up.
We met with the on-call doctor and he told us we weren't going to be happy with the ultrasound. Baby B has turned sideways and is no longer head down. We will now need a c-section. My cervix was still closed. He said the shakiness in the upper extremities and swelling in my hands was probably all related to the movement of the babies and how they were pressing on my nerves and such. He told me to come back in on Monday, I will have another appointment with him.
The nurse set me up with a Monday appointment.
When I got home, I had a message from the nurse to call her back. She said the doctor wanted to do a non-stress test so I am to report to Labor and Delivery on Monday morning at 10:00.
We will go from there.
We had a conversation with the doctor about delivery dates. Before this appointment I had been thinking that 38 weeks was the magic number and we would be induced then if we had not delivered before then. In my mind, I've had the date of June 30th. The doctor told us at this appointment that if we wanted, we could go ahead and induce this week at 37 weeks, or induce next week at 38 weeks, but he would be out of town part of the week and didn't know off hand was his schedule was. We also could wait until 39 weeks when he would be back in town, but he didn't think we would make it that far. Every day we're pregnant, the statistical chance of going into labor rises. That was quite a decision to make in the office. He said we could think on it and call back later that day.
When trying to make an appointment for next week, we asked if we could schedule an inducement with our doctor for next week at 38 weeks pregnant. The receptionist said that our doctor had no office hours the next week at all. So we left to go think some more.
We talked things over with family and decided, well, maybe inducing this Thursday at 37 weeks 3 days would be our best option because he would be able to deliver the babies. I called the doctor's office at 12:00, I waited on the line for over 20 minutes and no one answered the phone, I wasn't even redirected to the emergency line. at 12:30 I called again and no one answered. I called again at 12:45 and then again at 1:00. At 1:00 someone answered and said that my doctor and his nurses had left for the day and someone would call me back the next day. We were worried about getting everything scheduled so Noah called back and asked if someone could call us back today.
The nurse called me back and said that they couldn't schedule anything until tomorrow but it shouldn't be a problem. Then later on, the nurse called back and said she had spoken with the doctor and he wanted me to go in at 10:00pm Wednesday night to get started with the induction for Thursday morning.
All that night we continued to mull things over. We had thought this weekend would work really well with all our family's schedules, but things sort of fell apart and weren't as neat and tidy as we originally had thought. That wasn't a problem but it took the wind out of the 'oh this is the perfect situation'.
I also began to worry. 37 weeks. Are their lungs fully developed at 37 weeks? Will they end up going to the NICU at 37 weeks? Am I giving them their best chance at 37 weeks? Even though I am told every visit, how amazing it is to make it to 37 weeks and I am so grateful to have made it this far, am I looking a gift horse in the mouth to proceed with an elective procedure this soon? How would it be if a baby ended up in the NICU because of a decision I made for him? Isn't my sole job to give these babies everything I've got considering how healthy I am right now?
Of course on the flip side, going too long is also potentially dangerous. Is their chance of stillbirth rising now that we're so far along? Will the placenta dissentegrate? Will they get enough oxygen? Will they suffer from intra-uterine growth restriction?
I asked on my mother of multiples mommy board and read some more on the internet. I just feel like with twins there is this teeny tiny window of 'what is best.' Okay, I can make it to that window and I can easily induce in that window but the problem is, I also feel like that window is a moving target. Some places I read that that window is between 37w0d-38w0d, or is that perfect window 37.5w-38.5w, or is that window 380d-390d?????!!!
At 8:30am on Wednesday morning, I called the doctor's office and told the receptionist I wanted to cancel my induction. The nurse called me back and told me that was fine and to let them know if I changed my mind. I just felt that maybe 37 weeks was too soon. Some babies, especially white boys, end up going to the NICU at 37 weeks because of lung development and/or ability to eat. We gave Isaac until 40w4d and he was so perfect and so healthy. Don't Carleton and Corder deserve that as well?
I feel like the biggest decision I've ever made, where two lives are completely in my hands is right before me. I didn't even know this was a decision I needed to make until two days ago. Am I risking their lives by not inducing this week? If I try to induce next week without my doctor, will the new doctor pressure me into a c-section? Will the new doctor know my case history or know what is best for us? Will there be anyone looking out for us? If I somehow am able to make it to 39 weeks to be induced with my doctor, is that going too long and risking complications for the babies?
As of right now, at 6:45am on Thursday morning, I have nothing scheduled. I do not have an appointment for next week. I do not have an induction scheduled, I do not have a doctor's appointment scheduled. I feel like I could just fall away and no one would notice. I get it. I'm the adult, I'm the mother, it's up to me to make appointments and follow through with them. Hey, that's what I've been doing this whole pregnancy and with Isaac's pregnancy. But, then there's that insecurity I wrestle with. I certainly don't want to be a bother to them. So far, I've seen them on Tuesday, called them twice on Tuesday, and then called them on Wednesday to cancel the induction. Am I pestering them, am I being too needy, am I demanding too much? I know that I am not the most important patient and they are all really busy, but I also feel that I am at a weird and crucial place. I am 37w3d pregnant with twins. That's a scary place to be. I'm back to the same situation I was in while waiting for my glucose test. I knew they were taking way too long, I knew I needed to get that blood test, I knew I had gotten there in plenty of time, and I knew I had been forgotten but I sat quietly and waited because I didn't want to imply to them that they had made a mistake. And 45 minutes later, when I finally said something, they admitted their mistake and said I should have spoken up sooner.
I hate these situations. I don't want to be a bother to anyone. I don't want to demand things of people. But at the same time, I've got two lives who are 100% dependent on me. I can't fall back into the shadow because I feel safe there.
At 8:30am this morning, on Thursday. I am going to call the doctor's office back and ask for an appointment. I'll tell them I think I might be going into labor (hey I had contractions last night). They keep telling me to come on in, if I suspect something. Maybe I'll get a chance at another conversation. Maybe I can get some answers. I'm kind of freaking out. I feel very disconnected and alone right now and maybe my feelings are completely unjustified and I've just made mountains out of mole hills, which I am prone to do.
I called the doctor's office and the receptionist seemed quizzical as to why I wanted to set up an appointment. I told her I was feeling shaky and uneasy. She seemed reluctant to set up an appointment for me but she said a nurse would call me back.
After 11:00 a nurse called me back and said my doctor was unavailable but I could have an appointment with the on-call doctor at 1:00.
I came at 1:00 and met with the nurse. She asked me what was wrong and I told her I was feeling shaky. She asked when my next appointment was and I told her I didn't have one set up. She called my doctor's nurse who told her I was told to have come in that morning. I told her I was not told that at all. Yes, I had an induction set up and yes I cancelled it, but they had not scheduled me another appointment.
We had an ultrasound, the technician didn't say a word to us. I heard the heart beats but I don't know what they were. She spent more time than usual looking at the babies, I could tell something was up.
We met with the on-call doctor and he told us we weren't going to be happy with the ultrasound. Baby B has turned sideways and is no longer head down. We will now need a c-section. My cervix was still closed. He said the shakiness in the upper extremities and swelling in my hands was probably all related to the movement of the babies and how they were pressing on my nerves and such. He told me to come back in on Monday, I will have another appointment with him.
The nurse set me up with a Monday appointment.
When I got home, I had a message from the nurse to call her back. She said the doctor wanted to do a non-stress test so I am to report to Labor and Delivery on Monday morning at 10:00.
We will go from there.
Wednesday, June 18, 2014
June Update No. 3
On Monday June 16th I went in for an emergency doctor's appointment with the on call doctor. I had been feeling badly off and on that weekend, had been having some contractions, and woke up in the morning feeling cramps. Both babies had good heart rates in the 130s and had good fluid. My cervix was still closed but blood pressure was good. So no babies yet!
On Wednesday June 18th we had another doctor's appointment at 36w2d. They did weigh the babies this time. Five weeks ago Baby A was 3lb 9oz and Baby B was 4lb, today Baby A was 5lb 11oz and Baby B was 5lb 15oz. Baby A is closing that gap. We're so glad they are so close in size, they're not huge, but they're a good solid size especially for twins. Baby A had a heart rate in the 130s and Baby B had a heart rate in the 150s. Their heart rates have ranged between the 130s-150s for the last several months. They had good fluid again and both babies were still head down. The babies are lying with their heads together, with Baby A stretched across the lower part of my stomach and Baby B stretched upward. She was able to get a picture of Baby A's face but Baby B was facing backwards so he didn't get a picture. Cervix was still closed but the doctor said he could feel a baby's head, which means we're probably about 80% effaced but you can't tell for sure unless I was dilated at least one centimeter. So we're actually probably progressing pretty well. That makes me happy, I was getting a little worried about not progressing in time. The doctor said the cramps sensation is just when a part of the uterus but not the whole uterus contracts. So all good. We scheduled an appointment for next Tuesday at 37w1d but the doctor said we may not make it.
We asked some questions about what we should look for to send us to the hospital. Contractions must be painful enough that I have to stop what I'm doing and must be consistent for an hour. But, if we're unsure, we're to call the doctor's office 24 hours a day or come to the doctor's office first if it's within office hours to potentially avoid an unnecessary hospital copay.
Not matter what, the finish line is almost in sight, because sometime in the 38th week will be our cut off. Doctor still says he doesn't think we'll get to that point though.
House is ready. Car seats have been installed in the car by the hospital. Baby hospital bags are packed. Camera battery is charging. Nursery is stocked. We need to get a present for Isaac from Carleton and Corder, we're hoping to get him a Fur Real Kitty because he LOVES kitties, but we will never own one. (Sorry, Mama's allergies rule that one out!)
Baby A
Baby A biting his bottom lip (the thing pressed up against the right side of Baby A's face is Baby B's head ;)
On Wednesday June 18th we had another doctor's appointment at 36w2d. They did weigh the babies this time. Five weeks ago Baby A was 3lb 9oz and Baby B was 4lb, today Baby A was 5lb 11oz and Baby B was 5lb 15oz. Baby A is closing that gap. We're so glad they are so close in size, they're not huge, but they're a good solid size especially for twins. Baby A had a heart rate in the 130s and Baby B had a heart rate in the 150s. Their heart rates have ranged between the 130s-150s for the last several months. They had good fluid again and both babies were still head down. The babies are lying with their heads together, with Baby A stretched across the lower part of my stomach and Baby B stretched upward. She was able to get a picture of Baby A's face but Baby B was facing backwards so he didn't get a picture. Cervix was still closed but the doctor said he could feel a baby's head, which means we're probably about 80% effaced but you can't tell for sure unless I was dilated at least one centimeter. So we're actually probably progressing pretty well. That makes me happy, I was getting a little worried about not progressing in time. The doctor said the cramps sensation is just when a part of the uterus but not the whole uterus contracts. So all good. We scheduled an appointment for next Tuesday at 37w1d but the doctor said we may not make it.
We asked some questions about what we should look for to send us to the hospital. Contractions must be painful enough that I have to stop what I'm doing and must be consistent for an hour. But, if we're unsure, we're to call the doctor's office 24 hours a day or come to the doctor's office first if it's within office hours to potentially avoid an unnecessary hospital copay.
Not matter what, the finish line is almost in sight, because sometime in the 38th week will be our cut off. Doctor still says he doesn't think we'll get to that point though.
House is ready. Car seats have been installed in the car by the hospital. Baby hospital bags are packed. Camera battery is charging. Nursery is stocked. We need to get a present for Isaac from Carleton and Corder, we're hoping to get him a Fur Real Kitty because he LOVES kitties, but we will never own one. (Sorry, Mama's allergies rule that one out!)
Baby A
Baby A biting his bottom lip (the thing pressed up against the right side of Baby A's face is Baby B's head ;)
Wednesday, June 11, 2014
June Update No. 2
On June 10 at 35w1d we had another doctor's appointment. It's getting hard to get these appointments scheduled since we are on an every week schedule and we have to schedule both an ultrasound and doctor's appointment. They were able to squeeze us in to an ultrasound at 10:00 so we got there early at 9:50 but didn't get called back until 10:30. I thought both babies would be weighed again since it had been four weeks, but we were one day shy of four weeks so no weighing the babies. Apparently insurance will only pay for it once every four weeks. She took their heart rates and measured their fluid but didn't tell us either. She wasn't very talkative.
The doctor did not measure my belly but he did check the cervix and it is still closed. I was convinced I was going into labor because I felt really bad and in pain, but no, the babies were just hurting me. My doctor said I will become increasingly uncomfortable as they gain weight and shift down lower, but the good news is, the pain can come and go as they move around. By later that day, I wasn't feeling as bad, so that is good.
Things are definitely becoming harder. These last two days, all I've wanted to do is eat and eat and eat some more. I am really having to watch my protein intake and make sure I get tons of protein or else I feel horrible. Hopefully we're in the home stretch, because this is not very easy. I really need to watch my weight....starting tomorrow.....
Next appointment on June 18 at 36w2d. We'll see if we make it that far!
Praying for good movement from babies!
The doctor did not measure my belly but he did check the cervix and it is still closed. I was convinced I was going into labor because I felt really bad and in pain, but no, the babies were just hurting me. My doctor said I will become increasingly uncomfortable as they gain weight and shift down lower, but the good news is, the pain can come and go as they move around. By later that day, I wasn't feeling as bad, so that is good.
Things are definitely becoming harder. These last two days, all I've wanted to do is eat and eat and eat some more. I am really having to watch my protein intake and make sure I get tons of protein or else I feel horrible. Hopefully we're in the home stretch, because this is not very easy. I really need to watch my weight....starting tomorrow.....
Next appointment on June 18 at 36w2d. We'll see if we make it that far!
Praying for good movement from babies!
Tuesday, June 3, 2014
June Update 1
On June 3rd at 34w1d, we had another doctor's appointment. This time I went by myself while Noah and Isaac visited a farm. I had a new ultrasound technician and she had a lot of fun watching the babies. She printed many pictures, which we haven't done for almost two months now. Both babies were moving really well and both babies had a great amount of fluid. Baby A had a heart rate of 132 and Baby B had a heart rate of 133. Both babies are still head down. She said she could see them making really good breathing motions and their cheeks looked really healthy. Blood pressure was still great, and the nurse told me I am doing surprisingly well for 34 weeks with twins. The doctor measured my stomach but no other checks. We go back next week at 35w1d.
As we are getting closer to the final date, there are still some things we need to finish. There is still some cleaning around the house that should happen, we need to finish packing all the hospital bags, we need to get the car cleaned and the air conditioner repaired, we need to get the car seats installed, and I'm sure some other miscellaneous things. We've started stocking up on baby toiletries again. Noah figured out how to get the car seats to fit into the stroller which is now massive. I think driving this duoglider stroller will be harder than driving the harp on the cart.... We have made some great progress in the nursery, it is not as full or complete as Isaac's nursery was, but it looks nice, and we can continue to work on it as they grow. We need to get to Hobby Lobby to get the wooden sheep to put on their wreath to have at the hospital. Noah has ordered new tubes for the breast pump off of Amazon and started sterilizing all the bottles and storage containers. I feel that I've been so much more cavalier this time around than I was with Isaac, but worst case scenario, even after they're here we can get what we need. We live 30 seconds from the hospital, so if we need anything, it wouldn't be hard to get.
Questions:
Will we have a c-section?
Not necessarily. My doctor is just fine with a vaginal delivery providing both babies are head down. Even though both babies are currently head down, that's no predictor for how they will be come delivery day. Breech babies can flip at the last minute and head down babies can also flip at the last minute, so we will just wait and see. The doctor says to be prepared that it might be a c-section, which doesn't stress me. I am fine to do whatever is best and safest. Of course with a vaginal delivery there will be a chance that the first one is a vaginal delivery and the second one would be a c-section but my doctor says that's only happened to him about twice in 25 years so it's not that common. I think it is worth the risk though, so, given the option, I will opt for vaginal.
When will they be born?
When they want to be, pretty much. My doctor says that the average twins are delivered around 36 weeks. 38 weeks will be about our maximum, so we will be induced or have a c-section around that time if they have not come before then. I am not to the point in the pregnancy where I am even having cervical checks yet, which also isn't the best predictor, so right now, everything looks good, I guess they could come tomorrow or in two weeks, or in four, etc..Emily is voting for June 15 when the twins will be 35w6d because that is Noah's birthday and Isaac was born on my birthday...so....who knows?
Are they identical or fraternal?
Don't know. I have always suspected they are fraternal because I was on clomid which raises your risk of having twins because it increases your ovulation, but for us, there is no way to tell without a genetic test. Our twins are in two different gestational sacs with two placentas which could mean they are fraternal or it's possible for them to be identical since they are both boys.
Will they go to the NICU?
There is no way to know. By making it to 34 weeks, we have done really well. There is a low chance of any long term damage from here on out. Of course even post term babies can go to the NICU. From what I have read, the main reasons they might go to the NICU will be problems regulating their body temperature, the ability to eat on their own, and lung development. We're preparing ourselves for a possible NICU stay but understand that it will not be the scariest experience possible.
Do twins run in your family?
Well yes, Noah is a twin, but that's not why we're having twins. From what I've read, they really don't know what causes identical twins but it's not really hereditary and a father cannot have influence on fraternal twins, that's all mom.
Will we dress them alike?
Sometimes. We already have some matching outfits that have been bought specifically for them, but they will be wearing a lot of Isaac hand-me-downs. I don't have any strong opinions about this, we'll probably only shell out money for matching outfits for big occasions like Easter and dedication. (Those outifts have already been bought, and they are really, really sweet, couldn't pass up a 50% off deal).
Where will they sleep?
Well this is my biggest stress point right now. I have no idea what is best. Through much deliberation and weighing of pros and cons which include flat heads, torticullis, SIDS, Isaac's roughhousing etc... We are going to begin by putting them in the crib together but swaddled in swaddle pods in their own room. Isaac is still coming into our bedroom around 3 or 4 in the morning and to put a rockNplay or pacNplay next to our bed might be dangerous with him right there. The crib might be the safest option. If the crib does not work for them, we will look into something else. The rockNplays have been heavily suggested to me by other twin moms and I looked at them at Babies R Us and they really are not very different than a bassinet, so that might be a good option. We have the packNplay and bassinet ready to go, if they need to be separated. They shouldn't be rolling over when they first come home, and the crib is large.
Which Baby is Carleton and which is Corder?
We haven't decided yet. We know that one of the babies will be named Benjamin Corder Hoppe-McQueen and the other baby will be named Jesse Carleton Hoppe-McQueen but we are not deciding who is who in the womb which is why I still refer to them as Baby A and Baby B. Really, it doesn't matter. They'll be named at birth. Maybe we'll do it alphabetically, we should have a plan pretty soon so they can get their hospital identification bracelets.
Where are they going next year?
Home. We are staying home together. Isaac will still go to his half day preschool because that is something we value. It has been a good experience for him and we are excited for the social and emotional learning he is getting there. I will not be teaching anymore. Lots of new changes will be coming up for us all soon.
So really there are a lot of unknowns for this month of June. We don't know when we will go to the hospital or how long we will stay there. For now, I am mostly just resting and not stressing, perhaps I am too calm because it hasn't yet hit me how real this will all get pretty soon. I am monitoring their movement, and doing what I can to help their safety and health. I don't know what the future holds for this month, or next month and beyond so we will see.
Noah got the car seats to fit in the stroller. Very Massive Stroller!
As we are getting closer to the final date, there are still some things we need to finish. There is still some cleaning around the house that should happen, we need to finish packing all the hospital bags, we need to get the car cleaned and the air conditioner repaired, we need to get the car seats installed, and I'm sure some other miscellaneous things. We've started stocking up on baby toiletries again. Noah figured out how to get the car seats to fit into the stroller which is now massive. I think driving this duoglider stroller will be harder than driving the harp on the cart.... We have made some great progress in the nursery, it is not as full or complete as Isaac's nursery was, but it looks nice, and we can continue to work on it as they grow. We need to get to Hobby Lobby to get the wooden sheep to put on their wreath to have at the hospital. Noah has ordered new tubes for the breast pump off of Amazon and started sterilizing all the bottles and storage containers. I feel that I've been so much more cavalier this time around than I was with Isaac, but worst case scenario, even after they're here we can get what we need. We live 30 seconds from the hospital, so if we need anything, it wouldn't be hard to get.
Questions:
Will we have a c-section?
Not necessarily. My doctor is just fine with a vaginal delivery providing both babies are head down. Even though both babies are currently head down, that's no predictor for how they will be come delivery day. Breech babies can flip at the last minute and head down babies can also flip at the last minute, so we will just wait and see. The doctor says to be prepared that it might be a c-section, which doesn't stress me. I am fine to do whatever is best and safest. Of course with a vaginal delivery there will be a chance that the first one is a vaginal delivery and the second one would be a c-section but my doctor says that's only happened to him about twice in 25 years so it's not that common. I think it is worth the risk though, so, given the option, I will opt for vaginal.
When will they be born?
When they want to be, pretty much. My doctor says that the average twins are delivered around 36 weeks. 38 weeks will be about our maximum, so we will be induced or have a c-section around that time if they have not come before then. I am not to the point in the pregnancy where I am even having cervical checks yet, which also isn't the best predictor, so right now, everything looks good, I guess they could come tomorrow or in two weeks, or in four, etc..Emily is voting for June 15 when the twins will be 35w6d because that is Noah's birthday and Isaac was born on my birthday...so....who knows?
Are they identical or fraternal?
Don't know. I have always suspected they are fraternal because I was on clomid which raises your risk of having twins because it increases your ovulation, but for us, there is no way to tell without a genetic test. Our twins are in two different gestational sacs with two placentas which could mean they are fraternal or it's possible for them to be identical since they are both boys.
Will they go to the NICU?
There is no way to know. By making it to 34 weeks, we have done really well. There is a low chance of any long term damage from here on out. Of course even post term babies can go to the NICU. From what I have read, the main reasons they might go to the NICU will be problems regulating their body temperature, the ability to eat on their own, and lung development. We're preparing ourselves for a possible NICU stay but understand that it will not be the scariest experience possible.
Do twins run in your family?
Well yes, Noah is a twin, but that's not why we're having twins. From what I've read, they really don't know what causes identical twins but it's not really hereditary and a father cannot have influence on fraternal twins, that's all mom.
Will we dress them alike?
Sometimes. We already have some matching outfits that have been bought specifically for them, but they will be wearing a lot of Isaac hand-me-downs. I don't have any strong opinions about this, we'll probably only shell out money for matching outfits for big occasions like Easter and dedication. (Those outifts have already been bought, and they are really, really sweet, couldn't pass up a 50% off deal).
Where will they sleep?
Well this is my biggest stress point right now. I have no idea what is best. Through much deliberation and weighing of pros and cons which include flat heads, torticullis, SIDS, Isaac's roughhousing etc... We are going to begin by putting them in the crib together but swaddled in swaddle pods in their own room. Isaac is still coming into our bedroom around 3 or 4 in the morning and to put a rockNplay or pacNplay next to our bed might be dangerous with him right there. The crib might be the safest option. If the crib does not work for them, we will look into something else. The rockNplays have been heavily suggested to me by other twin moms and I looked at them at Babies R Us and they really are not very different than a bassinet, so that might be a good option. We have the packNplay and bassinet ready to go, if they need to be separated. They shouldn't be rolling over when they first come home, and the crib is large.
Which Baby is Carleton and which is Corder?
We haven't decided yet. We know that one of the babies will be named Benjamin Corder Hoppe-McQueen and the other baby will be named Jesse Carleton Hoppe-McQueen but we are not deciding who is who in the womb which is why I still refer to them as Baby A and Baby B. Really, it doesn't matter. They'll be named at birth. Maybe we'll do it alphabetically, we should have a plan pretty soon so they can get their hospital identification bracelets.
Where are they going next year?
Home. We are staying home together. Isaac will still go to his half day preschool because that is something we value. It has been a good experience for him and we are excited for the social and emotional learning he is getting there. I will not be teaching anymore. Lots of new changes will be coming up for us all soon.
So really there are a lot of unknowns for this month of June. We don't know when we will go to the hospital or how long we will stay there. For now, I am mostly just resting and not stressing, perhaps I am too calm because it hasn't yet hit me how real this will all get pretty soon. I am monitoring their movement, and doing what I can to help their safety and health. I don't know what the future holds for this month, or next month and beyond so we will see.
Seats Ready to Go in the Living Room
Isaac's old car seat is in front and the new one is the back. I think they match pretty well.
Noah got the car seats to fit in the stroller. Very Massive Stroller!
The Nursery So Far
The Nursery So Far
The Nursery So Far
The Nursery So Far
The Nursery So Far
Baby B
Baby B
Baby B
Baby B
Baby A
Baby A
Baby A
Baby A
Baby A
Getting Ready for the Hospital
Friday, May 30, 2014
May Update No. 2
On May 28th we had a doctor's appointment at 33w2days. Baby A had a heart rate of 137 and Baby B had a heart rate of 149. Both babies looked good. Everything they measured for me also looked good. We will return next week at 34w1d.
We took Isaac with us to this appointment to see the babies. We've been talking to him a lot about Carleton and Corder. We tell him that they live in Mama's tummy and that we will go to the hospital to meet them. He is able to identify all the baby things in the house that will belong to Carleton and Corder. I do not think he really gets it though. We're trying to make him a part of the process as much as possible though. When watching the ultrasound he seemed more concerned about the gel on my belly than the images on the screen. In his defense though, those images barely look like anything anymore. Up until about a month and half ago, I could look at the ultrasound screen and see what looked like a baby; head, body, and limbs. Now all I see are shapes, they are too big to be captured in an image and it is much harder to interpret. When the doctor came in, Isaac was pretty good, but when Noah asked some questions, Isaac freaked out and started squirming and whining. We cut the visit short, though there was nothing to say. Everything is in good order.
School finished last week. We are officially home for the summer and I am officially done as a teacher indefinitely. I am not sure how many more paychecks I will receive, but we are trying to savor these last ones to make sure we have enough put away for the upcoming medical bills. We have been working around the house with the help of my sister. We're getting pretty close. The nursery is getting close to being ready. Noah figured out how to fit the car seats in the stroller. I have a wedding on Saturday and after that, we can dedicate the car to the babies. We'll need to get it all cleaned out and vacuumed and take all the car seats to the hospital to get them installed. I need to get a checklist going. I had a checklist for Isaac and I need another one this time. I have to get hospital bags ready and diaper bags ready, and think about any sort of toiletry items the twins will need. I am really much less prepared this time around. I think I've almost been maybe in some sort of denial, just so stressed about avoiding preterm labor, completing the school year, and Isaac, that I haven't had time to really prepare.
My school room is completely cleared out and I finished up filing all the music away. It's been tough trying to find a space for everything out of the second bedroom and my school room but somehow I think we've found a place for everything. Living in a small house with no closet space forces you to be very creative. I am thankful for they money and time we invested into the house last summer. Those extra purchases and touches have really come in handy in preparation for our growing family .
We are not taking any sort of childbirth classes this time around. Really, I don't know what to expect at all. The doctor said he doesn't think I'll make it to 38 weeks but we have no idea when I will deliver. I have no idea what to think; I'll just follow whatever recommendation I am given depending on how the babies are positioned and doing. I am trying not to stress over it or feel as if I am under prepared because even if I wrote out the most detailed birth plan, things can change at the last second and it could all be for naught. Ultimately we will follow the guidance of the doctor, so we'll just wait and see.
We took Isaac with us to this appointment to see the babies. We've been talking to him a lot about Carleton and Corder. We tell him that they live in Mama's tummy and that we will go to the hospital to meet them. He is able to identify all the baby things in the house that will belong to Carleton and Corder. I do not think he really gets it though. We're trying to make him a part of the process as much as possible though. When watching the ultrasound he seemed more concerned about the gel on my belly than the images on the screen. In his defense though, those images barely look like anything anymore. Up until about a month and half ago, I could look at the ultrasound screen and see what looked like a baby; head, body, and limbs. Now all I see are shapes, they are too big to be captured in an image and it is much harder to interpret. When the doctor came in, Isaac was pretty good, but when Noah asked some questions, Isaac freaked out and started squirming and whining. We cut the visit short, though there was nothing to say. Everything is in good order.
School finished last week. We are officially home for the summer and I am officially done as a teacher indefinitely. I am not sure how many more paychecks I will receive, but we are trying to savor these last ones to make sure we have enough put away for the upcoming medical bills. We have been working around the house with the help of my sister. We're getting pretty close. The nursery is getting close to being ready. Noah figured out how to fit the car seats in the stroller. I have a wedding on Saturday and after that, we can dedicate the car to the babies. We'll need to get it all cleaned out and vacuumed and take all the car seats to the hospital to get them installed. I need to get a checklist going. I had a checklist for Isaac and I need another one this time. I have to get hospital bags ready and diaper bags ready, and think about any sort of toiletry items the twins will need. I am really much less prepared this time around. I think I've almost been maybe in some sort of denial, just so stressed about avoiding preterm labor, completing the school year, and Isaac, that I haven't had time to really prepare.
My school room is completely cleared out and I finished up filing all the music away. It's been tough trying to find a space for everything out of the second bedroom and my school room but somehow I think we've found a place for everything. Living in a small house with no closet space forces you to be very creative. I am thankful for they money and time we invested into the house last summer. Those extra purchases and touches have really come in handy in preparation for our growing family .
We are not taking any sort of childbirth classes this time around. Really, I don't know what to expect at all. The doctor said he doesn't think I'll make it to 38 weeks but we have no idea when I will deliver. I have no idea what to think; I'll just follow whatever recommendation I am given depending on how the babies are positioned and doing. I am trying not to stress over it or feel as if I am under prepared because even if I wrote out the most detailed birth plan, things can change at the last second and it could all be for naught. Ultimately we will follow the guidance of the doctor, so we'll just wait and see.
Sunday, May 18, 2014
May Update
On May 14th we had a doctor's appointment at 31 weeks and 2 days. Baby A weighed 3 pounds and nine ounces and Baby B weighed 4 pounds exactly. This is about an 11% difference. Both babies were head down, side by side, and very, very low. Baby A had a heart rate of 140 and Baby B had a heart rate of 134. Everything looked good and we scheduled another appointment in two weeks.
We have done a lot of work to the house. The dining room is being cleared out and we have gotten more and more organization done. We still have a ways to go. Our finish line goal is June 1st.
We have done a lot of work to the house. The dining room is being cleared out and we have gotten more and more organization done. We still have a ways to go. Our finish line goal is June 1st.
Wednesday, April 30, 2014
April Update No. 2
As the final countdowns continue, I made it through last week with a before school choir rehearsal, study hall choir rehearsal, after school choir rehearsal, two fifth grade performances, Sewanee rehearsal and concert, and normal teaching load. This week will not be as bad: before school choir rehearsal, double period choir rehearsal, and after school choir rehearsal are the only extras on the to-do list this week.
On April 28th I was 29 weeks and had a doctor's appointment. I had an ultrasound but they did not weigh the babies. Both babies had a heart rate of 143. They were also both lying facing my back so we did not get any pictures. They still had plenty of fluid. I had another short doctor's visit and everything looks good. I will go back in two weeks at 31 weeks and after that I will begin coming every week. Hitting the 32 week marker is important, because once you hit that there will not be any long term issues.
On April 28th I was 29 weeks and had a doctor's appointment. I had an ultrasound but they did not weigh the babies. Both babies had a heart rate of 143. They were also both lying facing my back so we did not get any pictures. They still had plenty of fluid. I had another short doctor's visit and everything looks good. I will go back in two weeks at 31 weeks and after that I will begin coming every week. Hitting the 32 week marker is important, because once you hit that there will not be any long term issues.
Wednesday, April 16, 2014
April Update
After my last doctor's appointment was spring break. The week after, we started to drive to the end of the school year and for me, a permanent end. Too many mixed feelings to really dwell there, but for the present, an overpowering fatigue, and a readiness to complete all current commitments. In these next five weeks, I will complete my fifth grade programs, have the middle school choir concert, complete the end of teaching school, complete my after school choir rehearsals, have the community children's chorus concert, complete those Tuesday night rehearsals, have a Wednesday night share time with the Kinderchoir, complete Wednesday night Kinderchoir classes, and take two trips to Sewanee for a rehearsal and performance with their symphony. My last work obligation will be the last day of May for a wedding in Huntsville, my last harp gig until August. I have turned down both of my usual summer camp teaching opportunities, too many mixed feelings to dwell there as well. June and July are completely free; for the first time in my life ever.
On Monday April 14th, I was 27 weeks pregnant and took my glucose test....well kind of. I had my lab slip, so I went to CVS and bought the candy bar and a 20 ounce Dr. Pepper because they don't sell individual cans. I brought the Dr. Pepper home and measured out, 12oz and drank and ate and completed my sugar intake at 10:30. At 11:15 I left to go to the doctor's office, at 11:20, I gave the lab paper to the receptionist who then told the lab worker. I sat down out of sight of the receptionist so I was closest to the door where the lab was. I waited. At 11:30 I was still waiting. There was no one in the lobby at all. At 11:40 I was worried, I wondered if I should say something, but I really don't want to be one of those demanding people. I try to be respectful and patient. At 11:50 I was still waiting, and had been there for thirty minutes. I have never waited thirty minutes before. I went back up the receptionist and told her I had been waiting for 30 minutes. She asked me when my one hour mark had been, and I told her 11:30. She went over to where all the nurses were talking, I could tell she was upset. She came back and told me, I would probably need to come back another day, it needs to be at the hour mark but the lab worker was going to talk to me. Then the lab worker called me back and apologized and said that she had been told I was here........ Well she took my blood anyway and said she would make a note on my chart that it had been taken late.........I'll be sure to ask at my appointment on Wednesday to see if I should come back and take it again.
On Wednesday April 16th I had a doctor's appointment. This appointment was the first time in 15 weeks since I was 12 weeks pregnant that I have made it from one appointment to the next without a trip to the hospital, so yay, I guess I'm calming down. They measured the babies and Baby B weighs 2 pounds and 8 ounces and Baby A weighs 2 pounds and 4 ounces. The doctor said this was great. Baby B had a heart rate of 147 and Baby A had a heart rate of 150, so their heart rates have switched but they are extremely close but Baby B is still the big baby and Baby A is still little. The internet seems to say that a weight difference of around 25% or 30% or more is problematic....I suck at math but I think there is about a 10% difference in these two weights......I really hate math.....In ounces Baby A is 36 ounces and Baby B is 40 ounces. Even though I had an ultrasound, I didn't get a picture because the babies were lying in very uncooperative positions to get a good picture which doesn't bother me at all. For me, I like the ultrasounds just so I can see that they are moving well and measuring well. I did not find out the results of my glucose test, but I told the doctor I was twenty minutes late taking it and he said that wasn't a problem. I assume everything is fine there. As usual I make mountains of mole hills. He measured my belly, so I must be growing appropriately. He told me that they are still lying lengthwise on top of one another, so they're not turning yet, but that can change at anytime, so no concern yet. I go back in two weeks at 29 weeks. Doctor said everything was perfect and I should just continue doing whatever it is that I am doing.
On Monday April 14th, I was 27 weeks pregnant and took my glucose test....well kind of. I had my lab slip, so I went to CVS and bought the candy bar and a 20 ounce Dr. Pepper because they don't sell individual cans. I brought the Dr. Pepper home and measured out, 12oz and drank and ate and completed my sugar intake at 10:30. At 11:15 I left to go to the doctor's office, at 11:20, I gave the lab paper to the receptionist who then told the lab worker. I sat down out of sight of the receptionist so I was closest to the door where the lab was. I waited. At 11:30 I was still waiting. There was no one in the lobby at all. At 11:40 I was worried, I wondered if I should say something, but I really don't want to be one of those demanding people. I try to be respectful and patient. At 11:50 I was still waiting, and had been there for thirty minutes. I have never waited thirty minutes before. I went back up the receptionist and told her I had been waiting for 30 minutes. She asked me when my one hour mark had been, and I told her 11:30. She went over to where all the nurses were talking, I could tell she was upset. She came back and told me, I would probably need to come back another day, it needs to be at the hour mark but the lab worker was going to talk to me. Then the lab worker called me back and apologized and said that she had been told I was here........ Well she took my blood anyway and said she would make a note on my chart that it had been taken late.........I'll be sure to ask at my appointment on Wednesday to see if I should come back and take it again.
On Wednesday April 16th I had a doctor's appointment. This appointment was the first time in 15 weeks since I was 12 weeks pregnant that I have made it from one appointment to the next without a trip to the hospital, so yay, I guess I'm calming down. They measured the babies and Baby B weighs 2 pounds and 8 ounces and Baby A weighs 2 pounds and 4 ounces. The doctor said this was great. Baby B had a heart rate of 147 and Baby A had a heart rate of 150, so their heart rates have switched but they are extremely close but Baby B is still the big baby and Baby A is still little. The internet seems to say that a weight difference of around 25% or 30% or more is problematic....I suck at math but I think there is about a 10% difference in these two weights......I really hate math.....In ounces Baby A is 36 ounces and Baby B is 40 ounces. Even though I had an ultrasound, I didn't get a picture because the babies were lying in very uncooperative positions to get a good picture which doesn't bother me at all. For me, I like the ultrasounds just so I can see that they are moving well and measuring well. I did not find out the results of my glucose test, but I told the doctor I was twenty minutes late taking it and he said that wasn't a problem. I assume everything is fine there. As usual I make mountains of mole hills. He measured my belly, so I must be growing appropriately. He told me that they are still lying lengthwise on top of one another, so they're not turning yet, but that can change at anytime, so no concern yet. I go back in two weeks at 29 weeks. Doctor said everything was perfect and I should just continue doing whatever it is that I am doing.
Friday, March 21, 2014
March Update
This is a long one, so I broke it up with headings.
On February 28th, we headed down to All Steak in Cullman where we met up with family to have our reveal. Emily made poppers, and signs, and had blue and pink clothes pins for everyone. We opened the box, and out came two blue balloons! I will admit, the naming process was a bit more difficult this time around but not too long after, all our ideas came together and we decided. Long before I was even pregnant, I had in my mind the names Corder and Carleton. Corder is Noah's mother's maiden name (and the last name of his uncle and cousins and now cousins once removed). Carleton was the maiden name of my mother's mother, our Nana. Also, before I was pregnant, I started a pinterest board for a maybe someday baby/sibling for Isaac and while searching for big brother pictures I found this picture.
I thought the big brother looked so much like Isaac. Little then did I know, that we would have twins. It's strange but it was like I had been almost prepared.
Well long story short, we decided to call the babies Corder and Carleton. Their full names are Benjamin Corder and Jesse Carleton. Benjamin Corder is Noah's great grandfather's name and Jesse is the name we gave to baby my mother miscarried when I was ten who would have been a freshman in college this year. Benjamin and Jesse are both Old Testament names like David, and all three boys will be called by their middle names. (they'll live).
Naming Babies!
On February 27th, Mom, Dad, and I took the envelope with the babies' gender to Party City. The girl helping us was very sweet; we picked out the style of balloon we wanted and told her to put the two colors we needed in a box we had brought. As we walked around the store, she got the balloons ready for us and we left that night with a sealed box with two balloons.On February 28th, we headed down to All Steak in Cullman where we met up with family to have our reveal. Emily made poppers, and signs, and had blue and pink clothes pins for everyone. We opened the box, and out came two blue balloons! I will admit, the naming process was a bit more difficult this time around but not too long after, all our ideas came together and we decided. Long before I was even pregnant, I had in my mind the names Corder and Carleton. Corder is Noah's mother's maiden name (and the last name of his uncle and cousins and now cousins once removed). Carleton was the maiden name of my mother's mother, our Nana. Also, before I was pregnant, I started a pinterest board for a maybe someday baby/sibling for Isaac and while searching for big brother pictures I found this picture.
I thought the big brother looked so much like Isaac. Little then did I know, that we would have twins. It's strange but it was like I had been almost prepared.
Well long story short, we decided to call the babies Corder and Carleton. Their full names are Benjamin Corder and Jesse Carleton. Benjamin Corder is Noah's great grandfather's name and Jesse is the name we gave to baby my mother miscarried when I was ten who would have been a freshman in college this year. Benjamin and Jesse are both Old Testament names like David, and all three boys will be called by their middle names. (they'll live).
Hospital
So after our twenty week ultrasound, I had a pretty uneventful couple of weeks. My main goal was to make it to my next appointment without going back to the doctor or hospital before then. On March 14th, I went to the Mothers of Multiples consignment sale. I had really been looking forward to this because I wanted a stroller. I also wanted some sort of infant bouncy/swingy apparatus because we only had one. Well, I was able to get in really early, and I found the stroller but as I was leaning over to pick up the vibrating infant chair I tripped over a door hanging bouncer and fell down. Of course almost five different people came over to see if I was alright. I did not land on my stomach but on my right ankle and knee. I kept sitting for about a minute and then thought I was okay so I got up and went on about my business. I picked up a couple of matching outfits but then started getting worried, maybe I wasn't alright. So I went to the bathroom to make sure I wasn't bleeding and I was not...but I worried that maybe I had leaked some amniotic fluid. I made my purchases and went to the car and called the nurse. Because I have had this fear before, and even been to the doctor's office for this exact fear just a couple of weeks earlier I wanted to call and assumed the nurse would tell me to just lay down and take it easy unless other symptoms appeared, but she told me to go to Labor and Delivery. So for the third time, I headed over there. For the third time, I filled out the paper at the registration desk with the same receptionist (she's always there, she must be getting tired of seeing me) and the same parking attendant I've seen the last two times. The parking attendant was at least excited to see me because I finally had an answer to what gender the babies were... I had to call Mom and tell her where I was because she had Isaac, the last two time I've been I was able to go when I didn't have classes and Isaac was in school, so I didn't tell anyone that I was going. The nurse had a hard time finding the babies' heart rates because it's difficult using those doppler things, which is why I have an ultrasound every single doctor's visit, but with the help of another nurse they were able to find two heartbeats one in the 140s and one in the 150s, which was where they were last visit. She did some testing with the microscope and I was not leaking amniotic fluid. She called my doctor and I was dismissed. The next day a big, ugly bruise appeared on my knee and then my knee started hurting pretty badly. I had a couple of rough nights, but on Monday, Noah got me a heating pad from CVS that strapped to my knee and I wore that and finally felt better. Isaac really enjoys talking about his trip to the hospital. If you ask him about it, he says 'come back rabbit' which really makes me wonder, what did he and Gran Gran do in that waiting room...
Doctor's Visit
On March 21st we had a doctor's visit at 23 weeks and four days. They completed all measurements for Baby B and everything looked great. Baby A had a heartbeat of 145 and Baby B had a heartbeat of 151. They were both moving really, really well. I am feeling more and more movements and kicks all the time, but I still get nervous when I don't feel anything, but the ultrasounds confirm that there is a lot of movement that I don't feel yet. The doctor said everything looked good and we are scheduled to go back in four weeks. At our next visit everything begins getting kicked into high gear!! From there on out, we'll begin having visits every two weeks instead of every four, I need to complete my glucose test by next visit, and starting next visit they will begin to assess fetal weight. Third trimester is coming!!
Moving Forward
We have a lot of work to do. We've made some purchases already though, we have bought a rug, a bedding set, a stroller, and two infant vibrating seats. Noah is working on clearing out the babies' room and next week during spring break we'll continue to work. Noah has assured me that the nursery will be ready before they get here. I'm glad to have gotten through the month of March which brought back a lot of memories from last year that I thought I had forgotten. There are so many similarities in my March schedule from year to year that served as a reminder of previous feelings but I'm happy to move forward and to have had a good doctor's visit.
Wednesday, February 26, 2014
Any Guesses?
Busy Month! So the first weekend of February Carmen finished up. Our next appointment was set for February 28th at 20 weeks and 4 days.
During our snow week of February 11th-14th, we headed down to Meridian Mississippi for two days. Isaac stayed in Huntsville with grandparents.
The next Wednesday on February 19th, I had been feeling bad for a while and decided to call the doctor. While we were in Meridian, we made a brief stop into Wal-Mart and I got very dizzy and light headed. I ended up having to sit down on the floor for about a minute. Well off and on, I had been having contractions. Some tightening off and on and by Wednesday I was really worried. I called the doctor's office and the on call doctor set up an appointment in Labor and Delivery to have me monitored. I went to Labor and Delivery after my classes that day and they hooked me up. They monitored both babies' heart rates which were looking good and monitored the contractions. They also checked my cervix which was closed. Everything looked good and I was instructed to cease drinking Gatorade which I had been drinking since my stomach bug and drink water. Well since then, I've been drinking between 2-3 liters of water a day and have definitely noticed the difference.
The next Wednesday on February 26th, I became concerned that I was leaking too much fluid. I knew there was the possibility that it was not amniotic fluid but other icky pregnancy type things, so I looked up on the internet just for reassurance. Well of course, the internet will never offer reassurance, just panic in the highest degree. Sooooo....I called back to the doctor's office and the on call nurse told me to go back to Labor and Delivery. So I headed back. After I had completed all my paperwork at the hospital, my doctor's nurse called and told me to come to the doctor's office to get checked our there first. She said if everything looked okay, I could go home, but if it did not, they would send me back. So, I left Labor and Delivery before getting my bracelet and headed to the office.
At the office, the technicians who were super, super nice went ahead and did the big 20 week ultrasound since I was 20 weeks and 2 days. They got all the measurements for Baby A who looked great and was measuring right on schedule and weighed about 12 ounces. Baby A had a heart rate of 143. They got most of the measurements for Baby B, telling me they would finish up on my regularly scheduled appointment on Friday. Baby B was measuring ahead of schedule and had a heart rate of 157 and weighed about 14 ounces. Everything also was looking good with Baby B. They measured my amniotic fluid, and said it looked good.
I met with the doctor who also did some tests to see if I was leaking amniotic fluid, and all tests came back negative. He also told me, my cervix was above average even for a singleton pregnancy, which research has shown lessons my risk of preterm labor.
So everything is looking good. The babies were moving around a lot, at the hospital, the nurse had a hard time getting the heart monitors in just the right place, and they were moving around a lot at the ultrasound. Movement is good, active babies are good. I am feeling the movements more and more each day, though I don't feel every movement yet.
Everyone is being very, very nice and reassuring and not treating me like a mental patient. I promise, I did not act like this with Isaac. This is just so much more scary this time around. I don't want to overreact but I also worry about underreacting and something going wrong. My doctor said there is no way for me to tell if I am leaking amniotic fluid or not, so if something changes and I get worried to just come back in and they can check it out. My goal is to make it to my next appointment, which will actually be in three and half weeks because of spring break, without coming in for an extra appointment.
Because they got all the information they needed, I canceled my appointment for this Friday. The doctor said they could finish up some of Baby B's measurements the next time in four weeks. Soooo...... even though I had told the very nice ultrasound technicians I didn't want to know the sex yet because I could wait to Friday, I asked the nurse if she would ask them to write it down for me. The ultrasound technician brought out the envelope to me. So we plan to take the envelope to Party City and get two balloons placed in a box for Isaac to open at a family dinner on Friday.
So now I exercise my self control and not open the envelope. ;) It's good to get some reassurance that things are going well, it will be nice to be able to celebrate. I will continue to rest as much as possible and drink tons and tons of water. Four more weeks until viability!
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